Me? Midwife?

Sis : ***** tengah mengandung tau? (***** is carrying a baby, you know?)
Me : Emm, sejak kenduri kat ***** aritu, kan? (Hmm, since the ceremony at *****, right?)
Sis : eh, mana tau? (Eh, how did you know?)

Somehow, I’m a bit observant when it comes to female physical appearances. A little chemical imbalance in the girl/woman’s body, and there’s a chance I would’ve noticed it, if I was observing. I don’t know, maybe it’s that voyeuristic nature in me. Me and those who like to watch reality shows.

Oh come on. The Truman Show had shown how big this reality show is. And how big we are in poking into another’s life. We all are voyeuristic in nature, it’s just a matter of control.

There was once I detected a pregnancy amongst my friends earlier than my female friends. Even when they had been wearing only their undergarments in their room (it’s hot, temperature-wise) all along. Somehow I managed to notice the changes in the other part of her body other than the tummy part she was hiding.

I’m sure women out there would’ve known, that once conception occurs, the body goes into a different phase, and starts behaving differently. Some parts of the body starts to grow bigger, the skin starts to appear differently, and many other tell-tale signs. Maybe that’s how I unconsciously know about it.

Actually, the news I heard is a great news, since the baby would be the first in her family. It’s just I don’t feel like writing names here. And it’s just that some people are not comfortable around me, when I answer their question about their body a bit too detailed.

So girls, provided I have seen you recently, and I still remember exactly how you look a while back, be prepared to hear some detailed explanations on which part have gained/lost weight and how much you’ve grown/shrunk (?) over the period. That is, if you want to hear a honest answer.

So don’t go on asking “aku dah gemuk ke?” (have I gained weight?), or “Sesuai tak kalau aku pakai skirt/baju ni?”(does this skirt/dress suit me?) without preparing yourself for a full inspection. (:p)

Guys normally don’t care as much, but do we?


4 responses to “Me? Midwife?”

  1. But we still want an honest answer when we asked whether we look good in certain attire.

    Honest does not mean harsh, bear that in mind. If you think we should wear something else, please advise us diplomatically or suggest other thing that you think looks best on us. Or give us some money so we can shop for better clothes.


  2. roti2 : Some of my girl friends (notice the space and spelling), I know can handle direct, indirect or ‘sipi-sipi’ kind of comments.

    But still, at times I fail to determine when is being ‘honest’ meaning saying something nice in general before changing the topics.

  3. give us some money so we can shop for better clothes.

    ohoho, good one rotidua!

    so lizzam, have i gained weight? =p

  4. Intan : erm, I had to disagree. I mean, we still have Paris hilton and britney, 2 rich and most hideously dressed girls (to date).


    Anyway, if you want my opinion, I need to see u in flesh la. aritu bizi plak org tu, macam PM…(:p)